:: Thursday, April 24, 2008 ::

The Big Five

Explosions in the Sky, El Alamein, September 1942

They say ev'rything can be replaced, | Yet ev'ry distance is not near. | So I remember ev'ry face | Of ev'ry man who put me here.

We all know the Big Five. Globalisation, peak oil, food scarcity, climate change, and global warming. Alternatively, we have the leopard, lion, rhinoceros, buffalo, and elephant.

Personally, the Big Five-Oh's been the elephant occupying my mind. I've avoided 'birthdays' to now, relating instead to the adage "You're as young or as old as you feel" — and, like most, I feel pretty good. Reasonably fit, healthy, and sane, I was always going to experience and consider the present and future as a seamless continuum.

For some reason, these photographs changed that. They'd been lying in a box for years and were scanned only recently.

Digitising the aging prints, I realised that, had we a wall on which hung a rogue's gallery of generational genetics, I'd be among the grey or sepia visages staring out at God knows what. However, had they remained in the box, they'd become the faded remnants of long-ago attempts to immortalise the living.

They'd be the memories of somebody other than the rummager and, lacking names, they'd mean nothing.

I'd hit a speed bump on my personal space-time continuum and I felt uncomfortable. The elephant had gone rogue and was destroying the suburban order of my psychic neighbourhood.

I know there's no avoiding our being forgotten and this is no exercise in trying to prolong memory. These pictures gave me something else, and what they gave me put the elephant out of mind. Merely acknowledging that these prints represent little more than items of future curiosity put everything into fresh perspective.

They hold nothing but sentimental value and belong in the box from which I had taken them — with the elephant. While I believe we remain every age we've ever been, I do acknowledge the importance of endings.

Over fifty years, I've been there, done this, thought that. I have the T-shirt and I'm comfortable in my own skin. I've no regrets and I regard our global Big Five as opportunities to learn from experiences we're all going to find uncomfortable. Quite frankly, and this has always been at the back of my mind, I want to be around when the shit hits the fan.

Now unencumbered by having to grow up through the Big Five of convention, i.e. childhood, adolescence, adulthood, marriage, kids, etc. I'm free to explore the world.

And few will pay me heed. It's a glorious thought. I've been set free to play in the fields of the Lord for as long as is my lot and fuck anybody who crosses my path.

Cracked? I don't know and it doesn't matter.


The World Is Not a Cold Dead Place, Cape Town 1974

They say ev'ry man needs protection, | They say ev'ry man must fall. | Yet I swear I see my reflection | Some place so high above this wall.

Revelling in my newfound freedom, I ran slap-bang into Frank Paynter. For those of you who know him, you'd know immediately that our meeting would demand of a rigorous re-examination of my newborn hypothesis. For those of you who don't know him, watch The Straight Story.

That's Frank. He is to blogging as Angelo Badalamenti is to David Lynch.

Disconcerted by my uncharacteristic exuberance, Frank suggested a visit to Ronni Bennett. In fact: he put it thus:

Ronni Bennett writes “Time Goes By — what it’s really like to get older.” She is conducting a survey on the universe of bloggers over 50 (”elderbloggers”).

“The goal,” she says, “is to find out what elderbloggers are like, how we may be similar and how we are different, how we relate to technology, how we came to be bloggers or blog readers, how we feel about it and what our demographics are.”

The survey is multiple choice, anonymous, and hosted at Survey Monkey (a reputable firm). There are 57 questions. It took me only a few minutes to complete.

NOTA BENE: This survey is for elderbloggers and elder blog readers who do not keep blogs. Readers and commenters are as important as bloggers to the elderblogging community and help equally to make it as lively and compelling as it is.

Now don't get me wrong — I love Frank Paynter. He is one of the nicest guys you could hope to meet and is, to put all doubt to rest, a founding member of Very Nice People.

In the far distance, I heard a trumpeting elephant. I immediately started a mail to Frank:

I've not thought of bloggers in terms of age. I count myself and those with whom I blog as 'bloggers' and the rest as Johnny Come Latelys or, for example, in the case of Selene or AKMA and Margaret's contributions to a saner, more civilized world, bloggers of the same age group as my daughters. My son, I believe I regard in much the same way as you do yours, i.e. as my equal.

Mindful of JP's recent birthday, a thought did spring to mind. I was recently a bit rocked to discover one of our fellow bloggers was a retired U.S. naval commander. His age? 50. It startled me and, thinking back on my reaction, wonder if my surprise was not a result of the cultural / national / lifestyle / geographic differences distinguishing us.

A South African, I expect to work to 65 or 70 and assume I'll need to work longer; till I drop. Until then, I compete against high unemployment (officially anywhere between 25 to 45 percent), youngsters pouring into the marketplace, changing employment practices and, in SA, an imperfect but necessary affirmative action.

In short, I cannot think of myself as 'getting on', let alone being an 'elder' anything. Nor do I regret it. I work with people I respect and admire. They're smart, sharp, and their ages belie their years. Hell, some are in their early twenties and I just don't see an "age gap." Perhaps I'm missing something ...

I was heading back to where this blog entry starts out.

Hearing the elephant climbing out of the box, I left the mail unfinished and dashed over to Ronni's to complete the questionnaire. I'm pleased I did. Having survived the shock of finding myself among ElderBloggers, I found much else on Ronni's site over which to enthuse.

A couple of weeks ago, Tom Matrullo sent me the second instalment of a friend's recollection of a trip to Southern Africa. A beautifully written essay, its author is in her eighties. Her insights and observations are those of a travel journalist sent in to get the story behind the story.

Nothing escapes her eye and as little escapes her considered and informed opinion.

In their own distinctive ways, Frank, the geriatric romper room at Very Nice People, Ronni's site, Tom's friend, my family, and my colleagues bear out my original thesis, i.e. "You're as young or as old as you feel."

Tossing the elephant a bottle of Amarula, I tipped my cap to those I know, and shuffled off to find my slippers.

I see my light come shining | From the west unto the east. | Any day now, any day now, | I shall be released.

Bob Dylan | I Shall Be Released

Oh yeah...

Labels: 50 explosions in the sky

:: Mike Golby 10:10 PM [+] :: | :: :: ::
...

:: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 ::

Brave Dullard Bullish No More...

"He is an institution in our media community... he’s the conscience of our country."

Carte Blanche executive producer George Mazarakis

On apologising on national TV this evening for his racist article having offended detractors (including most South Africans), self-professed 'celebrity journalist' Brave Dullard confessed no regret at having written it. Disingenuously distorting Vince Maher's brilliantly provocative suggestion in the Mail & Guardian that racism might sometimes be revealed by the reading rather than the writing of contentious columns, the Sunday Times hack fired last week by editor Mondli Makhanya may some day come to view his appearance on 3 talk With Noeleen as his Britney Spears moment.

But I doubt it.

Bullard, covering his over-exposed and to now over-paid ass, smugly asserted he'd not been online since penning his pernicious piece. Denying knowledge of white-supremacist FaceBook groups (there are none) and myriad virulently racist annotators leaping to his unearned defence — and emboldened by reported job offers from several so-called leading Sough African print publications (the Independent Group's The Star picked up his latest piece), he was barely able to restrain himself from accusing the Sunday Times's editorial team and his readers of having written the execrable piece themselves.

Look, we have some great journalists in this country but our newspapers are far from world class. Dave Bullard might, given luck, contacts, and some bent and twisted acts of an unknown nature, be able to inveigle his way into a British tabloid but, as a newspaper columnist, he's sadly over-rated.

South Africans are presently engaged in an extremely healthy, sometimes volatile debate on racism and its effect on our society. Bullard, with an eye to the main chance, exploited the moment but betrayed his employers and South Africans by attempting to pass off a highly offensive piece of race hate as a 'contribution' to the debate attending one of our most dehumanising and debilitating social ills.

Perhaps more stupidly, he tried to pass himself off as a good journalist. Maher's column put paid to that little deceit.

If our media learn anything from the Brave Dullard, they should remember that engendering conflict generally leads to its realisation. Worse, poor journalism perpetuating the problems it purports to address drags our print media into a spin cycle of the sort evident on Google's news page, where thousands of publications daily bombard a gullible public with millions of words posing as substantive reportage.

The nauseatingly embarrassing U.S. presidential nominations race, the Global War of Terror, the U.S.'s impending strike against Iran, an imploding global economy, resource scarcity, irreversible environmental degradation and rumours of rain are prime examples of subjects on which a great deal of time, money, and energy are spent — while avoiding their subjects altogether.

The opportunistic likes of Bullard slither from this swamp of relativist verbiage to poison us with their words. They create a form of post-modern confusion in which it's acceptable for Thabo Mbeki to claim no crisis in Zimbabwe and for ANC secretary general Gwede Mantashe to accuse the Scorpions of "...sheltering former apartheid security police intent on destroying the ruling party."

I'm keen to communicate Mantashe's comment to one of my neighbours. A lawyer in the National Prosecuting Authority whose figure would lend a svelte allure to any SAPS uniform, she has assured me the Scorpions merely followed the money.

Cutting a somewhat forlorn and pathetic figure, Dave Bullard appears to be leaving the room.

"If something goes out with my name on it I want it to be excellent."

Dave Bullard

It is, Dave, it surely is... now remember to close that door behind you.

Bullard Apologises

Following threats to approach the Labour Court, Dave Bullard comes clean and apologises to his friends and readers in a column he cannot help but lace with implicit excuses for his loathsome behaviour:

"...I offer sincere and heartfelt apologies to those who were offended, including Mondli Makhanya, my friend and former editor, whom I respect enormously. Particularly offensive to so many was the suggestion that a family who had lost a child would mourn for a week or so and then have another child.

Despite my claim that this is a fantasy SA, I realise that this was an insensitive remark to make and I humbly apologise.

The use of the term "simple tribesmen" was never intended to imply stupidity but to suggest an uncomplicated lifestyle. Nonetheless it offended my readers and therefore requires an apology. Other critics referred to my cavalier disregard for ancestor worship and one even felt that my suggestion that huts were built to catch most of the day’s sun insinuated that black people are lazy. Once again, I am sorry to have caused so much offence to so many of my regular readers."

Dave Bullard

Isn't it amazing how swiftly "celebrity journalists", drunk with a power derived from the words they wield, distance themselves from any effect their words might have? Indeed, what can one do with a person like this?

You forgive him. I know I do. That said, I don't trust the Brave Dullard to behave any differently in the future than he has in the past. But it takes a big man to climb down and, for doing so, Dave Bullard has my respect.

Labels: dave bullard clonialism racism contrition

:: Mike Golby 11:52 PM [+] :: | :: :: ::
...

China plays its hand in Zimbabwe

It's Bullard's sort of shit that made me momentarily sceptical of Martin Welz's motivation in alerting the media earlier today to a ship, the An Yue Jiang, now in Durban harbour. It's carrying 75 tons of Chinese armaments for the Zimbabwean Defence Ministry. Welz cited Noseweek's publication date being ten days away as his reason, but I suspected publicity.

To his credit, he appeared to be the only person with detailed knowledge and documentation of the 1,500 RPGs, 3,500 mortar bombs, and three million rounds of ammunition for AK47 rifles making up Zanu-PF's cargo of electioneering materiel. Furthermore, he cited an invoice date of 10 or 11 January, indicating a delay in delivery — which possibly explains the delay in the release of that country's election results (my assumption).

My doubt was strengthened by Welz's urge to compel South African authorities to deny the arms shipment transit to the Zimbabwean border. He argued the shipment's contribution to violence in Zimbabwe could escalate, requiring SADC intervention and our troops ultimately facing the very weapons transported from Durban to Beit Bridge.

Martin Welz is our leading and most-enduring investigative journalist. His publication is required reading for both the innocent and the guilty in this crime-ravaged country. Of all people, he would know that, once alerted, government would proclaim the shipment embargoed in the interests of regional peace and stability.

The powers that be, in the country that midwifed Executive Outcomes, Sandline, Blackwater, Titan and other mercenary outfits would then — with unseeming haste, probably dispatch to Harare Antonovs stocked with an equal cargo of death and destruction.

Hell, Britain was selling weapons into Serbia and Iraq hours before going to war with those countries. During the 1982 British campaign to retake the Malvinas from Argentina, the destroyer H.M.S. Sheffield sank on being struck by a single French Exocet.

Weapons are money and know no nationality. Having comprehensively covered the arms deal now denying us electricity while sustaining many of our leaders' lifestyles, Welz should know this better than most.

I stilled my doubt. Welz alerted the media because one arms shipment denied Mugabe will mean countless lives saved.

Nevertheless, the circus that our media has become, epitomised by Bullard and redeemed in small part by the Mahers, Makhanyas, and Malalas of The Fourth Estate, leads me to seek deception in every line.

Update: If this report is to be believed, the An Yue Jiang has cleared customs. Whether or not its cargo — contravening others' sanctions on Zimbabwe, will be confiscated, remains to be seen.

However, as the weapons threaten to leave Durban for their destination, Sokwanele reports armed Chinese soldiers in the streets of Mutare.

The Chinese, together with about 70 Zimbabwean senior army officers are staying at the Holiday Inn, in the city's central business district. There are about 10 Chinese soldiers. "We were shocked to see Chinese soldiers in their full military regalia and armed with pistols checking (in) at the hotel," said one worker. "When they signed checking-in forms they did not indicate the nature of the business that they are doing and even their addresses."

While one can hardly blame the Chinese military for keeping a watchful eye on Beijing's vested interests, the timing of both the arms shipment and the presence of suspected "military advisors" in Mutare is an unlikely coincidence. I'm pretty sure their presence means Western powers, while continuing to pump out vacuous rhetoric, will now urge an "African solution" to the "Zimbabwe crisis".

South Africa will not interfere with a shipment of weapons aboard a Chinese ship that is destined for Zimbabwe, government communications head Themba Maseko said today.

"We are not in a position to act unilaterally and interfere in a trade deal between two countries," he told a media briefing.

The Times | SA won’t interfere in Zimbabwe-China arms deal

In terms of 2002's National Conventional Arms Control Act, Maseko's lying through his teeth. The guiding principles and criteria for allowing the conveyance of these arms to Zimbabwe include:

• avoid contributing to internal repression, including the systematic violation or suppression of human rights and fundamental freedoms;
• avoid transfers of conventional arms to governments that systematically violate or suppress human rights and fundamental freedoms;
• avoid transfers of conventional arms that are likely to contribute to the escalation of regional military conflicts, endanger peace by introducing destabilising military capabilities into a region or otherwise contribute to regional instability;

Following the National Conventional Arms Control Committee's (NCACC) decision Monday to ship the arms to Harare many, like Ray Hartley, must be asking "...what Professor Kader Asmal, the author of the policy on arms shipments has to say?"

"Let the blood-letting begin?"

"Well, ask the Chinese ambassador. ... Durban harbour handles goods for many countries on the continent. If you say there are weapons that have arrived from China in the Durban harbour, I think you should ask the Chinese. There might be a consignment of coal that is being exported to the Congo or something; it is a port, those weapons would have had nothing to do with South Africa. I really don't know what Zimbabwe imports from China or what China imports from Zimbabwe."

Thabo Mbeki

Arms Shipment Blocked

Following receipt of a most-illuminating link from Madame Levy (a Great Daughter of Africa), which partly exposes the degree to which the South African government and our homegrown weapons manufacturers have conspired to keep Mugabe in power, I awoke from a pre-weekend power nap to an Eyewitness News item (not yet posted to the Web) reporting that a Durban court has ruled in favour of an urgent application brought by Bishop Rubin Phillip and Gerald Patrick Kearney against shipping the above arms to Zimbabwe.

"The world’s astonishment at President (Thabo) Mbeki’s political defence of Robert Mugabe will likely turn into outright anger as we are now not only denying the existence of a crisis in Zimbabwe, but also actively facilitating the arming of an increasingly despotic and desperate regime."

Rafeek Shah (DA)

Save me the indignation of politicians, most of whom appear to hold our Constitution in contempt. Give me the righteous wrath of true friends instead. And a few good journalists.

A ship that was carrying weapons and ammunition destined for Zimbabwe lifted anchor and sailed from Durban less than an hour after the Durban High Court ordered that its controversial cargo cannot be transported across South Africa to that country.

The An Yue Jiang lifted anchor between 18:00 and 19:00 on Friday evening.

Several sources, who spoke on condition of anonymity, confirmed that the ship had set sail from the outer anchorage off the port of Durban.

News24 | Zim arms ship flees Durban

So what? Approached by the sheriff of the Durban High Court, it's safe to assume the ship's master — an employee of the state-owned Cosco Group, feared his ship being impounded. Nor does it break the rules of reason to assume such shipments have been clearing Durban harbour for years.

All in all, it seems Robert Mugabe has been protected by friends in all the right places. In short:

"President Mbeki needs to be relieved from his duty."

Zimbabwe Opposition Leader Morgan Tsvangirai | 567 CapeTalk and Radio 702

Labels: zimbabwe china mugabe mbeki crisis arms shipment blocked

:: Mike Golby 9:43 PM [+] :: | :: :: ::
...

:: Thursday, April 10, 2008 ::

Manifest Destiny

"Go West, young man..."

We should not condone China's actions. That is why I sent a letter to President Bush urging him not to attend the Opening Ceremony and why I am co-sponsoring the Defend the Olympic Spirit Act, which restricts funding to prevent any U.S. official from attending the Olympic Opening Ceremony in China, with clear exceptions for the security of any U.S. athlete and support staff. While I support our athletes and honor their achievements, the act of removing an official U.S. presence from the Opening Ceremony will send a clear message that we do not tolerate human rights abuses.

Representative Barbara Lee (D - CA) | China's record does not reflect the Olympic spirit

I had no idea Barbara Lee existed. Were it not for the San Francisco Chronicle, my blissful ignorance of her arrogance might have persisted.

My God, how swiftly the mighty have fallen and the deceitful and duplicitous have risen. This shameless hussy is certainly aware that America's proxy warlords — her bankers, having being flying in and out of Beijing, Singapore, and several Middle Eastern countries in recent weeks in a flurry of avionic activity not seen since Henry Kissinger circled the globe, sparking genocides, wars and coups in every country sullied by the imprint of his leather soles.

No, America's bankers have not made the trip to vent their spleens at regimes incapable of matching theirs for repressive brutality — they've groveled, wept, and wheedled their way to multi-billion dollar bail outs by the Eastern countries now propping up the U.S. economy. They own you, Barbara, and this is how you repay their largess?

Or, like our demented and much-ridiculed Deputy Minister of Safety and Security Susan Shabangu, are you merely playing to a gallery of fools?

Reverting to that which sparked my outrage — the "spirit" of the Olympic flame, I'll now pass the baton back to Howard Zinn.

The US mortgage crisis has spiralled into "the largest financial shock since the Great Depression" and there is a one-in-four chance that it will cause a full-blown global recession, the International Monetary Fund warned yesterday.

As finance ministers and central bankers arrived in Washington to discuss ways of tackling the crisis, the IMF warned, in its twice-yearly World Economic Outlook, that governments might be forced to step in with more public bailouts of troubled banks and cash-strapped homeowners before the crisis was over.

"The financial market crisis that erupted in August 2007 has developed into the largest financial shock since the Great Depression, inflicting heavy damage on markets and institutions at the core of the financial system," it said.

Guardian | We are in the worst financial crisis since Depression, says IMF

The new American militarism, as Andrew Bacevich calls it, encourages reliance on obsolete notions about power based on quantitative military advantage. Power now comes primarily from economic, financial, industrial, political, and cultural assets and influence, in all of which the United States is vulnerable. If American international hegemony is considered a threat, there are political and economic ways for international society to check it, not to speak of unconventional forms of military resistance, which have been employed with success in Iraq, in Lebanon last summer, and, much earlier, in Vietnam.

[...]

History does not offer nations permanent security, and when it seems to offer hegemonic domination this usually is only to take it away again, often in unpleasant ways. The United States was fortunate to enjoy relative isolation for as long as it did. The conviction of Americans in the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries that the country was exempt from the common fate has been succeeded in the twenty-first century by an American determination to fight (to "victory," as the President insists) against the conditions of existence history now actually does offer. It sets against them the consoling illusion that power will always prevail, despite the evidence that this is not true.

William Pfaff | Manifest Destiny: A New Direction for America

:: Mike Golby 11:25 PM [+] :: | :: :: ::
...

:: Sunday, April 06, 2008 ::

Mugabe—Tsvangirai Endgame...

"You blinked."

One morning, the blonde host began to tell me how much the world hated Robert Mugabe. The world, of course, called him a despot and considered his campaign against affluent white farmers, racist. "Even the blacks hate him," she said. That, I was not willing to believe. The Third World brain is universal and I knew that between the rich and their despot, the poor will always hate the rich more. Also, a man who is loathed by the liberal media usually has a covert mass support. In fact, Mugabe reminded me of Narendra Modi who had, the previous year, presided over very successful political riots in Gujarat.


"Did not."

We decided to ask the black maids if they liked Mugabe. The host told the maids softly, with an unnerving seriousness, that she had a question for which she needed a truthful answer. "Don't think I will be offended by your answer, don't think I'm your employer, don't think of anything, just speak the truth. Do you like Robert Mugabe?" The maids looked at each other and giggled. Then they said that they liked him. "He is for us," one of the maids said. The host was stunned. She would later tell me that the maids were ingrates, that she had fed them and clothed them and paid them handsome salaries, yet they loved Mugabe.

The Times of India | When Sehwag's Food Bill Was Just $150,000

"Zanu PF is for asserting our sovereignty and economically empowering Zimbabweans, but the MDC wants to surrender our sovereignty so that the country becomes a colony under the tutelage of the British. So clearly, we cannot see ourselves working with MDC Tsvangirai — it's like mixing water with fire! We believe our people are not daft and will make the choice based on the consolidation of the permanent changes that have been made." Zimbabwean Justice Minister Patrick Chinamasa

The Zimbabwe Guardian | Zanu PF snubs MDC

:: Mike Golby 4:21 PM [+] :: | :: :: ::
...

:: Thursday, April 03, 2008 ::

Air Heads

Platboom, Cape Point Nature Reserve

from Robert < dumbass @ idiots.co.za >
to mgolby @free stuff.co.za,
date Tue, Apr 1, 2008 at 10:43 PM

subject saw a pick of me pulling some airs @ platboom

howzit, saw a pick someone forwarded to me when i was surfing platboom sometime ago.

pick no: 13 looks pretty cool, but i cant save the pic ?? the one of the yellow town and county surf board

how do i go about doing this - nice work but please don't advertise surf spots in the reserve they are a sanctuary to a select group of us who hate the crowds,

regards,

robert

A direct translation of platboom would be "flat tree". Which, I guess, you could stretch to "plank". We have a saying in this neck of the woods, i.e. "as thick as a plank". It means "not very bright", "dumb" or, should one be more straightforward, "fucking retarded".

The above is the sort of mail that leads me to a generalized view of surfers as trust-fund kiddies with five centimetres of nothing between their ears. It is devoid of the fundamentals of civilized discourse. "I saw this. Give me that. Don't do this. I want that. Because I say so. Regards..."

Whoever sent it can thank God for surfers like Hugh du Toit. Hugh, the Queens and OTW locals, and a few surfers I've known most of my life, remind me that not all those braving the ocean wave deserve watery graves.


Platboom, Cape Point Nature Reserve

I've given pictures to more surfers than I care to remember. As somebody put it: "There are none so vain." But hey, they deserve the pics. And there are three people out there yet to get their shots. I remember those I've neglected rather than those to whom I've given. There's a mail and e-mail address I can't find, and another e-mail address (of a Queens local) I've forgotten. I owe those people.

Perhaps the guy in the mail above just doesn't know how to say "Please". It's a word with which we South Africans tend to have great difficulty. Nah... I don't think so. This one's about entitlement and arrogance. And white South Africans generally have no difficulty exercising those traits.

Look at it this way. Last year, the USPS gave me US$300 to license a picture of a seagull for a postage stamp — due out in 2009. Yeah, that's right. It works out to R3,659.65 at today's exchange rate. Why? Because the picture, like the one in this case, belongs to me. So we have two options. "Please" or a sizeable fee.

Whichever one you choose is fine with me.

Fun with Eugenics

"All your base are belong to us. Take me to your leader..."

Indeed... Fishrush meets RB? Why not?

This is a "science" evoking images of Hillary.

The blobfish (Psychrolutes marcidus) is a fish that inhabits the deep waters off the coasts of Australia and Tasmania. Due to the inaccessibility of its habitat, it is rarely seen by humans.

Blobfish are found at depths where the pressure is several dozens of times higher than at sea level, which would likely make gas bladders inefficient. To remain buoyant, the flesh of the blobfish is primarily a gelatinous mass with a density slightly less than water; this allows the fish to float above the sea floor without expending energy on swimming. The relative lack of muscle is not a disadvantage as it primarily swallows edible matter that floats by in front of it. It is often caught by bottom trawling with nets.

Pic of Mr. Blobby courtesy NORFANZ.

Wikipedia | Blobfish

:: Mike Golby 9:34 PM [+] :: | :: :: ::
...

:: Tuesday, April 01, 2008 ::

BadaBing!!!

The Cat that Stole the Cream

Does this guy look self-satisfied or what? Marek J. Maybe Elvis (aka Brother Marek) and his Peekaboo were married today in Plano, Texas. On 1 April. Seriously. As Marek so eloquently puts it:

"Some of you for years have heard from me this strange story about Love and Loss and Foolishness and you wondered: "Will I ever have such an exciting story like this guy?" The answer is 'Probably Not' but don't worry - you can participate as if you did. We are gladly giving this story away to you dear fools.

So today, on Saint Fools Days, we have gotten ourselves married. Let me present to you the history and future of us in three simple scenes.

Scene 1: it is 1988, 20 years ago - We are in Love. Those Fools we were thinking we can have this Foolish happiness for ever.
Scene 2: it is 2003, 5 years almost ago - We have just met again after 14 years of Foolish living, getting married to other people living in strange countries halfway around the world.
Scene 3: this morning, just being foolishly married.

Nice, isn't it? To all you fools, 'Have a wonderful day.'"

Is it possible to be truly happy for people one's not yet met? Well, Brother Marek puts these sort of things in perspective and to the test. In this case, the answer is an emphatic yes.

The Jesus Bunker poet laureate, executive officer of the Titanic Deck Chair Rearrangement Corporation®, gunslinger extraordinaire (he has a 30mm cannon mounted on the hood of his Caddie), founder of Kombinat!, midwife of RGE©, and Teacher in Residence at Father Christopher's Boulder-based Love Clinic, has done it again — proving love conquers all.

:: Mike Golby 10:09 PM [+] :: | :: :: ::
...

Mugabe Unlikely to Stand Down...

Cape Point Lighthouse...

Diplomatic and Zimbabwean sources who heard first-hand accounts of the Joint Operations Command meeting of senior military and intelligence officers and party officials on Sunday night said Mr Mugabe favoured immediately declaring himself president again but was persuaded to use the country's electoral commission to keep the opposition from power.

But in an unexpected twist, two senior sources in Mr Mugabe's ZANU-PF last night released their party's projected outcomes, which had the opposition leader, Morgan Tsvangirai, ahead on 48.3 per cent, against Mr Mugabe's 43 per cent. That would result in a re-run of the election, with a candidate needing 51 per cent for outright victory.

The atmosphere remained tense across the country yesterday with riot police in armoured carriers deployed in two of Harare's opposition strongholds. The commission continued releasing a trickle of results, but the opposition Movement for Democratic Change said it believed the count was being manipulated.

[...]

A senior diplomat who received accounts from two people privy to the Joint Operations Command meeting said it discussed shutting down the count, or the army declaring martial law on the pretext of defending the country from instability caused by the opposition claiming victory.

"They did not consider conceding," said the diplomat. "We understand Mugabe nearly decided to declare victory. Cooler heads prevailed."

Sydney Morning Herald | Mugabe plots to stay in power


Sunrise, Booi Se Skerm

Mugabe's security cabinet decided on Sunday night not to recognise defeat after the state election commission forewarned the president that he had lost the vote.

MDC officials said the accounts they received of that meeting hours later had the party worried that the government might cancel the election and arrest opposition leaders, or that the military might intervene.

Yesterday, the MDC presidential candidate, Morgan Tsvangirai, approached the former army chief, Solomon Mujuru, who is still a powerful figure within the military, to say the MDC is prepared to reassure the security establishment that a transfer of power would not lead to prosecutions for past crimes or a purge.<